I guess I struggle with the above and the idea of Christ. If one is not willing to be poor for a job, hobby, or something they love doing on this earth, for something that is tangible and brings them joy, then how can one say they would be willing to give their life to Christ? I’m thinking Luke 9:57-62

Maybe this is something that should be dwelled upon. For if God didn’t put these things in one’s life to love and to chase, then what purpose do they serve? And if one is not chasing dreams, as long as they are righteous pursuits, is one not taking what could be used to glorify God and casting it aside to follow earthly desires?

Following Jesus one learns a way of practical love. Loving thy neighbor, taking care of self and others. The question and inverse arises, can one fear God practically?

Today one would be hard pressed to find someone who fears God; one that shakes and trembles at the thought of an Almighty interfering with our everyday lives. God doesn’t seem to have that Old Testament closeness; the sword, and pestilence, and famine, and wrath… But it wouldn’t seem to me that the apparentness of God’s whereabouts should change anything–practical fear is still respect of the Lord, His statutes, and His Son’s teachings. I’m thinking Jeremiah 26

Christ has transformed Old Testament practical fear into New Testament practical love. The fear and the respect hasn’t gone anywhere, it’s just displayed differently. Love comes defined as respect, defined as good works, defined as righteousness towards others, defined as submission and vulnerability.

Two things. If you dream isn’t something that can fit into this definition of love, then it’s probably not a dream worth pursuing. And if you can’t fit something in this world into this definition, how can you begin to chase a God that requires all of this?

Today I let go. Let God give me my dreams now. I’m thinking Phillipians 3:13-14

“18 Then pay attention to how you listen; for to those who have, more will be give; and from those who do not have, even what they seem to have will be taken away.”

Luke 8

How many times a day do I hide Christ under a basket? A basket of music, a basket of cooking dinner, a basket of calling someone. When do I ever put him on a lamp stand? Hold on a minute I have to pray this one over, or let’s give thanks before eating this meal, or I will stop and get in the word for a few minutes.

It’s how I listen. If I do not pay attention to God, God right now, then what I even seem to have, His presence right now, will be taken away and I will not be able to feel Him. But if I listen, if I pay attention to God, then He will continue to lead me in a way that I can feel.

So my friends, will you hold me accountable. That means calling me out on things I say or do. Checking in with me about what I am listening to or consuming. Guiding me and seeing me through. I promise that by helping me become closer to Christ and God you gain as well. Can you help me?!

I love the Parable of the Sower.

4 While a large crowd was gathering and people were coming to Jesus from town after town, he told this parable: 5 “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on, and the birds of the air ate it up. 6 Some fell on rock, and when it came up, the plants withered because they had no moisture. 7 Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up with it and choked the plants. 8 Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up and yielded a crop, a hundred times more than was sown.”

When he said this, he called out, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear.”

Luke 8

Reading it again today I stopped to think about what Jesus meant. I believe this not only to be an illustration to go spread the word and make disciples of men, not only to talk and share with fellow followers of Christ, but a metaphor to constantly and deliberately expose oneself to Christ’s teachings, the word of the Bible, and fellowship because not everything you hear, read, or experience will grow where it hits you in life.

Today I read the first few verses of Matthew 7.

1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. 3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

It hit me pretty hard that I have been judging and condemning others lately. It has created a rift in my spiritual life. I can think of three separate occasions in the past two days that I have really been out of line. It has affected every part of me. I have been wondering why I can’t write, why I have no motivation…to take pictures, to read new things, to capture thoughts. All I could do was to move around in the physical world–exercise was the only thing that made sense.

I think this really speaks to how important it is to be attune with God and his will. Fighting Him leaves me completely drained emotionally, physically, and without inspiration. I get myself into trouble and I wonder why. I have been in this slump for nearly a week and a half.

Oswald Chambers wrote a daily devotional, this is taken from the June 17th entry.

…the Holy Ghost is the only One in the true position to criticize, He alone is able to show what is wrong without hurting and wounding.

I heard a sermon on this Sunday. I read it today. Only now do I understand that trying to take the place of judge of other people, to try and show them what is wrong, I am wounding and hurting. It’s being done to me and I to others and I to myself. An effort needs to be made to change this state.

If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you.

1 Peter 4:14

This verse is bittersweet and I am scared as to what it says about my own faith life. It implies that I am not behaving as a Christian should. Living in a Christian manner should be dangerous. And yet all I could write down the other day was a prayer for God to meet me in a place where I was comfortable living, comfortable with myself…with who I was. If I could get myself to a place where I didn’t feel I needed to be defined by products or brands, then I could be comfortable. Then John Miller‘s talk at Liquid Tuesday hit me. I shouldn’t be comfortable and I shouldn’t need to define myself by anything but my faith…and that wasn’t even what he talked about.

The bittersweet is that I can’t see this implication without action from others. To be insulted means I actually have to be doing something. Radiating Christ’s love, this is apparent above. Then what is truly bittersweet is the fact that no one (or very few) care to insult because of the name of Christ. Who takes objection when I say I am a Christian? Only someone as set in their faith of a different brand. For the rest of the world it is much easier to let me be a Christian, say, “That’s nice,” and just go on with their day. This could be that we are taught freedom of religion from a very young age, or that the idea of a Christian has no greater meaning to most than a person who follows a dead guy. The first ruffles feathers, the second strikes fear into my heart. Where is the demonstration of Christ’s love? How can I act?

Just found an article on the Resurgence that pertains, you should read it.

I came home.
My friends are scattered around the country and my support/accountability system is gone.
Four days have passed and I feel my relationship with God changing.
I am slipping, my time isn’t being used to it’s best capacity and my relationship is suffering.
Four days.

But being away from school is good.
A step back has allowed me to see that I need to address my relationship with God with more intention.
It’s something I want to grow and mature.
I need that accountability, but it’s on me to care.

My mother emailed me this morning to check in.
She included that she and my father had just attended a new Bible study the night before.
The study is entitled “God Is Closer Than You Think.”
She found it of particular interest that the author of the book they are using as a guide made the point that many people feel God is far away.
That He is separated from us by a vast divide, spatially or spiritually.
Yet he is not.

From my mothers email,

He [the author] also began with Michelangelo’s painting in the Sistine Chapel that shows God fully extending his arm and finger, reaching toward man. Man has his arm propped up on his knee, his wrist is limp and his finger is curved downward; he barely makes any effort to try to close a very small space to come in contact with God. This illustration and thought just blew me away.

Have I taken this laissez faire approach in my relationship? Have you?

I believe that God is just in all his actions.
My argument goes like this.
We can not as humans put a label on God as good or bad, because we can not understand the reason of all his actions.
God preforms his actions with justice, and that’s just how it is.

Before we left dinner last night my friend suggested I read through Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis.
I picked up a copy of it last evening and have made it through the first book of the three enclosed.
In the first book in the final chapter Lewis addresses the reader with a ‘Cause to be Uneasy.’

The first passage I want to cite is this:

It is no use, at this stage, saying what you mean by a “good” God is a God who can forgive. You are going to quickly. Only a person can forgive.

The second is this:

…unless the power behind the world really and unalterably detests that sort of behavior [referring to human greed and trickery and exploitation], then He cannot be good. On the other hand, we know that if there does exist an absolute goodness it must hate most of what we do.

This portrays a conflicting idea of God.
If He detests these bad actions completely He is good, but through hating them He would be shown to be evil.
As I said before, I don’t think we can label God’s feelings or actions as good or evil.
We have to accept that He is outside of being confined by these words.

God said to Moses, “I am who I am.”

Exodus 3:14, NIV

God is just.
In both meanings of the word.

One more thought from C. S. Lewis.

If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end: if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth.